Classroom Jokes

Teacher: What happened in 1869?
Student: Gandhi ji was born..
Teacher: What happened in 1873?
Student: Gandhiji was four years old..

Teacher: Because of Gandhiji's hard work what do we get on 15th August.
Student: A holiday....!!

Teacher: Tomorrow there will be a lecture on Sun, Everyone must attend it..
Santa: No ma'm..! I will not be able to attend it.
Teacher: Why...?
Santa: My mother will not allow me to go so far....!!

Teacher: There is a frog, Ship is sinking, potatoes cost Rs 3/kg.. Then, what is my age?
STUDENT: 32 yrs..
Teacher: How do you know?
STUDENT: Well, my sister is 16 yrs old and she is half mad..

Teacher: Where does God live..?
Little boy: I think he lives in our bathroom..
Teacher: Why do you say that..?
Little boy: Well, every morning my daddy bangs on the bathroom door and says, 'God, are you still in there..?'

Chirkut in the farm

One day, Farmer Chirkut was in town picking up supplies for his farm. He stopped by the hardware store and picked up a bucket and an anvil. Then, he stopped by the livestock dealer to buy a couple of chickens and a goose. However, he now had a problem: How to carry all of his purchases home?

The livestock dealer said, "Why don't you put the anvil in the bucket, carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in your other hand?"

"Hey, thanks!" the farmer said, and off he went.

While walking he met a little old lady who told him she was lost. She asked, "Can you tell me how to get to 15 Rose Mary Mario Lane?"

The farmer said, "Well, as a matter of fact, I live at 20 Rose Mary Mario Lane. Let's take my short cut and go thru these sarso ke khet. We'll be there in no time."

The little old lady said, "I am a lonely widow without a husband to defend me. How do I know that when we get into the khet you won't ravish me?"

The farmer said, "Holy shit, lady! I am carrying a bucket, an anvil, two chickens, and a goose. How in God's name could I possibly hold you up and do that?"

The little old lady said, "Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the anvil on top of the bucket, and I'll hold the chickens."

Business::This is what its all about.

Father : "I want you to marry a girl of my choice"
Son : "I will choose my own bride!"
Father : "But the girl is Bill Gates's daughter."
Son : "Well, in that case...ok"

Next - Father approaches Bill Gates.
Father : "I have a husband for your daughter."
Bill Gates : "But my daughter is too young to marry!"
Father : "But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank."
Bill Gates : "Ah, in that case...ok"

Finally Father goes to see the president of the World Bank.
Father : "I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-president."
President : "But I already have more vice- presidents than I need!"
Father : "But this young man is Bill Gates's son-in-law."
President : "Ah, in that case...ok"